THE DREAM

Sunday, October 16, 2011

This dream opened in the midst of the noise created by an event. A new event complex replete with hotels and brand new venues was being opened. I noticed all the fittings such as discreet portable lighting designed to fit into the modern layout. They looked like parts of the building but had not been installed. Hotel staff we scurrying around trying to do the job after the event had started.

A friend of mine had just installed a brand new swimming pool that was covered by a concrete hatch to keep it clean. A group of us were admiring it. The hatch was under a concealed part of the back garden and I felt it was impractical. Lifting the lid I dipped my body into the cold water.

What I noticed was the constant dipping of people led the water to get very warm very quickly so I investigated.

I found an underground facility that was ultra modern with lots a fail safe systems designed to keep the pool water free of unwanted contaminants. The priority was to ensure the water posed no occupational health and safety hazards to people using the facility.

That was the end of part one of the dream.

In part two I investigate why I was at this event that did not seem to have much to do with me.

I was at this event to deal with the dog of an old lady I cared for in the past. I was advised I had to put it down. In the dream I thought its disposal had been arranged by the vet so I was a bit miffed to find this had not been done and now it was up to me.

I went to the old ladies house and the dog was not there but the smell of it was on the place it usually sat. Being kind to the old lady I let her know the dog had been taken care off so she could go to the event with her friend.

I found the dog in a pool partly filled with perfectly clear water that was supposed to drown it. I rang the vet and was advised over the phone to pour boiling hot water into the pool as that was the way to humanely dispose of the dog. I did as instructed but the dog walked around under the water and showed no signs of dying. It did not seem to notice it was in seriously hot water and looked that same as it always did.

I found this very distressing as I was left to deal with this dog that was actually some one else's job and now the water was so hot I could not put my hands into it to get the dog out. The situation was untenable and I wanted to do something different with the dog.

I spent the most time in the dream observing closely this dog walking around calmly under the hot water. I wanted the dilemma resolved so I added some more hot water so it could not reach the surface to breath as I wanted this death over as quickly as possible. My efforts seemed so futile. The dog seemed unchanged and behaved as it normally did.

My husband appeared in the dream and a pager he had went off. It actually belonged to the hotel staff and it seemed my husband's own pager had been accidentally switched with theirs somehow. The result was I could hear two conversations at the same time as we were in the lobby of this facility where the pager was activated by the lobby staff.

Now I was really annoyed. I had the phone that belonged to the event manager and my husband ended up with the pager of the hotels concierge. It was a monumental stuff up and I was dealing with the mess.

The page was to advise us the dog was ready to collect from the vet. I arrived to find one of my former trainees there as a new recruit so I asked her what was going on. The dog had been put into a container for me to give to the old lady so I took the container. After leaving the facility I noticed the lid did not fit and so I tried to put it on but the whole thing cracked open and some of the contents spilled out onto the floor of the shopping centre.

"Oh this is such a god damned mess!" I said to myself quickly grabbing for a plastic bag. I had to try and find one near a garbage can close by. I had to do something to contain the mess I was totally unprepared for. It had already spilled onto the floor and created a hazard for shoppers coming and going and I had no way to clean it up.

My hands were already dirty and I wanted the mess to be dealt with before the old lady arrived in the shopping mall to find her dog spattered all over the floor. It was just awful.

As the dream closed I was angered that the vet service had done such a poor job. I felt the newness of the facility and the excuse of glitches in a new facility were no excuse.

In my awake life this morning I shared this dream with my husband who counter shared he had woken in the night with and amazing revelation "The way you think is more important than what you think."

For me this is an example of how I process complex emotional dilemmas. I find sharing my dreams open me up to the input of other people. In this case my husband's input by sharing his night time revelation was very helpful.

The dog in hot water is myself - the dream is telling me that even in hot water I can function normally. This event has not affected me adversely and that is a very positive thing even though I am very angry about it.

BACKGROUND INFORMATION First thing yesterday morning the phone rang and it was the boss of my boss. She rang to let me know I had to be stood down from my new job immediately as I had been deemed medically unfit by my pre-employment medical. It seems the paperwork letting them know this had only arrived the day before and she apologized for the impost this was for me. I had already started work and completed the pre-employment training.

As a former employer of staff it was clear to me this was a monumental stuff up. To be rung on a Saturday morning and fired from my job forthwith over the phone is an appalling way to treat staff.

This event was a real shock.

I have not had a permanent job since 2003 and its now 2011. For the last 6 months I took a non-ongoing position with this employer as a trial to see if I could work part time hours at 25 hours per week and hold my own. I had been cleared as fit to work in February this year by my own medical team so I have been testing the waters of part time employment for the last 6 months and held my own.

My boss recommended me for my new position and so I moved forward in good faith. I was very confident I could do the work and meet the physical demands of the job given my health issues had not been an impediment to my work in the temporary position. I got the job done so it was time for the next step.

In training I was highly commended and our group is the first group ever to have completed the training tasks completely in the time frame so I started work very confident my skills were above average.

To find my body was deemed unfit was a shock as this work is done by many retired people and my employer took on people with disabilities as part of their work mission. The oldest person to retire from this position was 92 so I was very confident my body shape and condition was not a significant factor in my continuing employment.

When I took the call I asked what they meant by unfit and she said my BMI was 51.6 and the work entailed climbing flights of stairs in units that had no lifts. That is why I was sacked.

Bottom line - I am too fat to be deemed fit for work - no matter how skilled I am my body shape matters above all.

Is it any wonder women suffer from anorexia and body dyspromorhia? In the dream my body represented by the dog did not fit in the container provided and I spilled out onto the shopping centre floor becoming an OH&S risk that had to be cleaned up.

I love me "I love my body" I am sad I just don't fit in with this employers idea of a suitable worker. So it's back to the drawing board and I am wondering if I am now unemployable. A misfit that has to be cleaned up discreetly and discarded appropriately like an unwanted pregnancy - aborted clinically with minimum risk to all the stakeholders affected by my unwanted life.

I am still alive and I am still here - but like they said in a Dr Who episode many years ago - I am the Not We and I am "Mad" about that.

Here is my protest. A fat lady is not a person who is mentally ill - and I refuse to accept this label. It was my dietician who referred me to the psychologist in the first place and now I say "How can they describe a perfectly good mind as mad just because it comes inside a fat body! That's a nonsense and my outstanding skills in the training this employer put me through is proof that I am not mad just fat".

I am good and "MAD" for very "GOOD REASONS"!

This is the issue being sacked has brought sharply into my very clear and very sharp mind.

Posted at www.Dreamsymbolism.info October 15, 2011, 18:06 by iceberg rose (Viewed times)

Unclesirbobby (POSTED October 16, 2011, 15: 7: 13) hi Dianne

Sorry to hear about what's happened. I would feel very bitter about how you were treated. The vet to me is symbolic of your employer. The dog was appallingly treated. I find it difficult to share dreams when I am going through crisis. Its easy to see how troubled your emotions are right now. Whe we have to fight against a world that does not accept us it comes through especially in dreams.