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Rats,worms,flies and maggots

THE DREAM It is night time in my dream. I am standing in my dark living room talking with someone. I don't see there face, but I think it might be my mom, but am feeling ill at ease with this person, like I have to make excuses all the time with them and I never feel that way with my mom. I am talking quietly with this person, because my baby is asleep in his crib in the corner of the living room and he is sick and I don't want to wake him. I am telling this person that the baby has been sick for days and I can't seem to make him well again and I don't know what to do. We walk over to the crib and peer down at the sleeping baby. He has kicked his blankets off and they are bunched in the corner of his crib but there is something writhing around under them. I think it must be my cat, and momentarily am horrified that she has climbed into the crib with him. I pull the blankets up and am twice as horrified when I see dozens of rats,maggots worms and beetles crawling around on some slimy rotten thing. I quickly snatch my baby up, disgusted. At the same time, I am humiliated and immediately start making excuses to the person beside me, swearing that the rot and rat's and such were not there when I put the baby to sleep. The person says nothing, but I can feel the judgement coming from them. Suddenly I notice the air is thick with flies so thick that I am breathing them in and choking on them. Every inch of my living room floor is covered with them as well, and all I can see is a black squirming mess. I wake up and check on my baby right away. He is fine.

BACKGROUND INFORMATION The day before I had this dream, my baby was actually sick. He had a small fever and a runny nose, I wasn't particularly worried about it, because he was cutting several teeth and knew this was the reason for his illness. But I had been thinking before bed that I should sanitize his bottles and bedclothes the next day just in case.

In reality I am a crappy housekeeper. My house is 600 square feet and I have 3 messy children (4 if you count my husband) so no matter how much I clean it is always messy. I think the person in my dream might represent my father in law. Recently we have ceased all contact with him as the relationship with him seemed toxic to my husband and I. He would always come over to our house and complain (not to us, but to whoever else would listen) about how messy it was. Whenever one of the kids would get sick, he would say it was because of my lack of housekeeping. I always found myself making excuses to him, about how I worked 2 jobs and grew up in a messy house and so on and so on and cleaning the house shouldn't rest solely on my shoulders. (But to him it's "women's work") I always felt ashamed and humiliated when he would come over. The person in my dream made me feel that way and it's strange that I kinda thought it was my mom. I thought maybe that had to do with the fact that I feel my father in law should behave as a supportive parent but does not. Our relationship with him ended when he threatened to call child protective services on me. He said he would make sure they knew it was me and not my husband who was unfit as house cleaning should be my responsibility and not his. My best friend worked for cps and assured me that a few dirty dishes, unfolded laundry and toys on the floor were not grounds for having my children taken away.

Nonetheless, when I woke up from this dream I cleaned and sanitized the house from top to bottom and felt very fearful that my father in law would show up unexpectedly all day.

I am guessing that the rats worms and flies are representative of germs or something.

Posted at August 29, 2012, 09:03 by hauntedlily (Viewed times)

Unclesirbobby (POSTED August 29, 2012, 14: 3: 28)
Yes I think you understand the dream absolutely. The rats and maggots represent germs. Your father in law appears as your mother because he is playing the role of mother... showing concern for the children.

I think you are right to cut yourself off from your father in law.

My history teacher at school once said if you are going to tell a lie then tell a big lie. People will always believe it a little bit. In this case he has even got you doubting yourself. When someone comes up saying that you are not a good mother then you will always remember it. It nags away at you. Its only because you love your kids and its important to you. If you really were a bad mother then you would not have a guilt trip like this dream. When someone states it so openly then part of you is always going to be asking yourself if its true. You will find that the harshest judge is always yourself.

I would try to ignore what he says.

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